Funeral Reflection for Sister Ruth Margaret Karabensh
Sister Nicole Kunze, Prioress
November 7, 2024
We gather as a faith community today to celebrate the life of Sister Ruth Margaret. We extend our sympathy to Sister Ruth Margaret’s family – her sister Caroline and her nieces and nephews, in particular Ruth Keller and Chris Schirado who are here with us today. We sisters thank all of you for your prayers and support for us.
In the Rule, Saint Benedict provides guidance and job descriptions for various positions in the monastery – prioress, novice director, cellarer – overseer of the goods and possessions, and the porter – the person at the front door. For over 40 years, Sister Ruth Margaret was one of our porters or switchboard workers. That means she was one of the outward faces of our community, often the first person a guest would meet. Let me share a few verses from Chapter 66 of the Rule:
“At the door of the monastery, place a sensible person who knows how to take a message and deliver a reply, and whose wisdom keeps them from roaming about. As soon as anyone knocks or a poor person calls out, the porter will reply, ‘Thanks be to God’ or ‘Your blessing, please,’ then, with all the gentleness that comes from reverence of God, provide a prompt answer with the warmth of love.”
In her comments on this chapter, author Sister Joan Chittister said “the porter is to be warmth and welcome at all times, not just when it feels convenient.” Whether she was greeting visitors at the front desk, setting up table decorations in the dining room, or serving patients in the hospital, Sister Ruth Margaret was “warmth and welcome” and shared her joy for life in all her works.
So many of her ministries touched all of us in community. One that I found particularly touching was her prayer ministry. For years, she would place the names of sisters, family members, friends, doctors, and other important people in her life in a basket and draw a name or two each day and pray for that person. She often informed us Sisters with a note in our mailbox or on our bedroom door that she prayed for us that day. During my time as prioress, she informed me that she would pray for me every Monday, not just when she drew my name out of the basket, due to the demands of my role. I appreciated her care and concern for me. In these last years, she walked to the prayer board multiple times a day so she knew who and what to pray for, often needing a magnifying glass in order to read the notes.
Sister Ruth Margaret shared her joy in the dear notes and letters she sent to family and friends. She came to switchboard with her basket or box of cards and stickers, ready to write a birthday card or a card for a holiday. She had a dear pen-pal relationship with a Campus Friend, a University of Mary student from the early 1990s. They corresponded with each other over the years and the alumna continued it even when Ruth Margaret was no longer able to write a reply.
I first became acquainted with Sister Ruth Margaret when we were part of the Tuesday morning laundry crew during my novitiate. We only worked about 20 minutes before we had a coffee break and Ruth Margaret always brought the treats. Whatever she served, you could be assured it would be sweet.
Our community appreciated getting to know Marian and Art Zueger, Sister Ruth Margaret’s sister and brother-in- law. They were frequent visitors to the monastery. Ruth Margaret and Marian talked on the phone each evening for years. That short check-in was a touchpoint each one appreciated. I trust they are enjoying a game of dominos now in heaven.
Sister Ruth Margaret lived a full and faithful life in our Benedictine community for 73 years. Thank you, Sister Ruth Margaret, for sharing your life with all of us. We are grateful for the gift you have been to us. We will miss your presence among us. May you now share in the glory of God with the saints in heaven.
